How to tell if you are dating or with the right man?

I know it’s hard sometimes, You feel like things are going well when you are together. However, sometimes he just doesn’t seem to be available on many levels, which has made you feel insecure. The feelings are usually in the pit of your stomach eating you up at night, sometimes to the point where you can’t even fall asleep.

Here are some things to watch out for, to tell if you are dating or with the right man.

First, is Emotionally Distant lately –

He always looks perturbed or pre-occupied with his thoughts, the tv, or better still his phone. The second that phone text message beeps, he drops whatever he is doing, and voila!   He seems to not care about the conversations you have with him anymore. In other words, you feel that he is emotionally unavailable.

Next is the Physical

Physically – He is into his body more than yours.

Is he always at the gym working on his physique? I know your wondering does he even notice what I’m wearing today or that I got my hair cut, nails were done, eyelashes done, changed the color of my hair.  Oh, and I hate to tell you, that many women change their hair color or do something drastic like chop of all the length if they feel insecure.

What about Financially -$-

If he is always short on change, or perhaps he is not able to pay his bills for the month and is constantly begging to borrow or asking for money from you, this is a bit of a disappointment as well. You are not his financial bank loan officer or his mom.  Take notice of how many times recently you have been dreading his question of if he can borrow money from you even if it’s only five bucks here or there, just until he gets paid.

Please ask yourself, Has he paid you back the other little amounts he has borrowed from you? If he hasn’t why not? Is it because you let that slide for fear of losing him? Wake up please. that is usually a huge red flag.

 Is it Time to have “The Chat”

 By the chat, I mean that you feel that you need to sit him down and have “ the Chat” about your relationship.

The chat about your relationship usually means… your wondering how this relationship is going and if he feels like this whole dating thing is going anywhere.

“So what are we?” or “Where is this relationship going?” You keep wanting to have a chat with him. Perhaps you were hoping he would Pop the Big Question to get married or engaged soon. I know this can be very exciting especially if you have decided to move in together.

Am I Right?

What you are really saying is I’m really into you and I am feeling insecure and noticing you are possibly not that Into you.

(Good Movie by the way )

First of all, I get that you are in a relationship with him however conversations are usually just that conversations. They should be free-flowing and easy. If you feel that you have to sit someone down, to get their attention. You are with the wrong person.  Guys are like your friends, however, they don’t have to commit to your friendship if it feels “off” to them. If the relationship starts to get serious, you will know. He will know to demonstrate his love for you, in some kind way, most importantly his own way.

Listen to your heart to make the right decision for yourself.

Most importantly- please Respect yourself first.

 Do some Self -Care checking in

Lately, we are learning more and more each day about How Self Care is Crucial these days.
Check-in with yourself and ask yourself any of these questions.

Would my mom or sister act this way or put up with all of the above-mentioned red flags?

How would they react? How would you want your daughter to react? or perhaps your Sister?

How do I feel when I am with him?  Loved and respected?

Like a Princess? Yes, you deserve to be treated like a Princess! not with all the monetary things, but by the way in which he treats you with kindness and respect and compassion and genuine interest and involvement in your life. That’s all.

Are you being too needy? When is the last time you went out with your girlfriends and just hung out? Be a little mysterious, be busy, don’t be available.

Here is why.

Ladies, if you have to ask a man, “so what are we?” or “where is this relationship going?” The answer is nowhere. Men by nature are hunters and go for what they want. If he wanted you to be his wife, he would have proposed. If he wanted you to be his lady, he would’ve asked you. Men go hard for what they truly want. If he is not going hard for you, you are not what he wants.

 That right there was my inspiration for writing this article for you.

In Conclusion of how to tell if you are dating or with the right man?

Relationships are not meant for everybody.  If you feel that you have to keep checking in on him and asking him about the pulse of your relationship, something is wrong and you may not be with the right person.

 Please check in with yourself and see if you have the same hopes and dreams.

Here are some questions to check in with your self:

Is this someone that you could see yourself growing old with?

Having children with?

Does he even want children? if Yes How many?

Do you have the same career aspirations?

Does this stand in your way of getting married and having children timelines for you?

Another question you should ask yourself is what if I were to get ill, how would he react?

If there is ever a time to test and understand someone’s unconditional love for you is when you are sick.

I’m not saying to go and fake sickness or death to get a reaction from him. However, you probably can recall a time or two when you were feeling under the weather and made note of his availability to visit.

These are all things that you need to consider when deciding if you are wasting your time with dating the right man or woman for that matter. sometimes, the lesson is not always about trying to fix something that is broken, it’s about starting over and creating something better, even if that means being by yourself.

If you need help understanding what it is you are truly desiring why not create your Own Vision Board?

I have a blog post and video tutorial on how to create your own vision board. You can create one for your Relationship. Hope that helps you in determining if you are dating or with the right man.

I wish you the best of luck, I know it can be hard, But you always have to be honest with yourself first. that is your first and most important place to start. Your Relationship with You.

Let me ask you, Are you going to create your own Vision Board & be honest with yourself?

Comment below. 

YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE:

My Top 3 tips on How to Stop feeling Stuck,  Overwhelmed and Hopeless!

How to Find & Attract Your Love Chi using Feng Shui 

My 6 Secret Tips for Love and Relationships & Romance,

Originally posted 2017-10-06 04:32:52.